Sr. Teresa Jerome OCDM delivered this paper on Friday morning the 22nd of May as part of the Symposium conducted by the Carmelite Centre to celebrate the five hundredth anniversary of the birth of Saint Teresa of Avila
We
are honouring the 500th birthday of St. Teresa, for us Carmelites she is our
Holy Mother who has left us and the whole Church a great heritage. I
would like to begin with a quote from her birthday poem, a few selected lines,
which I think capture in Teresa’s poetic words some of the special moments of
grace in her life. I have chosen three sections, the early years leading to her
conversion, then establishing the reform and how she envisaged life in her
Monasteries, and something about her writings.
I am Yours, born for you
What do you want of me?
Majestic Sovereign
Eternal
Wisdom
If You will, give me prayer,
Or let me know dryness
Or darkness or sunlight.
Move me here or there.
Give
me Calvary or Tabor,
Desert or fruitful land,
Sorrowing or exulting,
You alone live in me.
Yours
I am, for You I was born
What do you want of me?
As
Teresa’s life unfolded she found what God wanted of her, but like so many of
us, she too had to search for her way, face the highs, the lows of her
indecision, and she has passed her story on for us, the story of God’s work in
her soul, God drawing her to holiness.
Teresa
was an extraordinary woman – born in a Spain that was trying to close its eyes
and ears to the religious and political upheaval that was smouldering in the
European countries – the Spanish rulers were trying to control the Church and
State of Spain in a firm and rigid grip with the Inquisition as watchdog over
both the written word and the prayer of Spain’s saints!
Teresa
of Avila came from a persecuted Jewish family, she broke out of the rigidity,
simply by living, by developing and using her great gifts.
So
much was against women, yet Teresa was able to write books which still speak to
us today – she lamented being a woman because she was deprived of doing things
for God which men were free to undertake, but her work has endured for
centuries. She could not speak in the Church, yet she is an acclaimed Doctor of
the Church with a world-wide audience, she was the foundress of a Reform within
the ancient Order of Carmel, giving to her Monasteries the stamp of how
she understood the Carmelite vocation and which has now spread to so many
countries in the world—we might be different in culture, language, liturgy, but
we can recognize each other as Carmelites, daughters of St. Teresa, our Holy
Mother, a simple, joyful, friendly smile is a good sign!
What
do you want of me? It took Teresa time to find what God wanted of her. When
writing of the period of her life before deciding to enter the Incarnation she
asked friends to pray that she would do God’s Will. There were really
only two options for a young woman of her background, marriage or religious
life. Marriage did not appeal to her, perhaps seeing her mother bearing nine
children and dying at 33 was not a good role model. Neither did religious life
appeal to her, and she tells with no hesitation that it was the fear of hell
that pushed her decision to become a nun. But once she had decided and told her
father, she said that nothing would make her change her mind. “I was so
persistent in thoughts of honour”. –no going back on her “life decision”
(a very different attitude to life decisions of today) She was a very
strong, determined Spanish young lady, preserving her honour, and with plenty
of umph and character! The reason for her choice? The Monastery was a safe
place to save her soul. As she said herself, she was moved by servile fear, not
by love. Her great desires to serve God and the Church would come later,
after her conversion.
Majestic Sovereign
If
You will give me prayer
Or let me know dryness
Or darkness or sunlight –
So
Teresa went through all these landscapes of the spirit as she set out in her
long struggle of almost twenty years with prayer – to live her life with
integrity and truth as the Rule of Carmel challenges all of us to do – its call
to silence and recollection, to live in allegiance to Our Lord Jesus Christ, to
live in continual prayer. Teresa’s battle with prayer during these early years
as a nun is a hard read. We can feel the tension and anguish, even as she
recalls it, years later. It was a battle between friendship with God and
friendship with the world, her friends, her attachments. She received graces,
calls within herself from Our Lord, even what she would later realize were real
encounters, mystical graces, to live a more radical, true following of her
vocation. She had great desires to serve God but not having the firm purpose of
will to give all to the inner call. “All the things of God made me happy; those
of the world held me bound ....my spirit was not proceeding as lord but as
slave”. They were hard years to live through and even for the reader
today, the wonder is that she could keep on going, falling back and
trying again; her determination well in evidence! I think that we have to
remember that this is a mature Teresa writing, a holy woman, graced by God,
looking back on her early life, judging herself from a new perspective – the
kind of self-judgement we make during life, the opportunities we too have
missed for a deeper “conversion”, that deeper turning to God, which we try to
live each day.
Teresa
knew dryness, darkness and moments of sunlight, before her agonized prayer to
the suffering Lord, won her the grace to let go the “frivolities” of her
friendships, the attachments that distracted her from total commitment to God’s
Will, distracted her from a life of prayer with all that it demands. Teresa
never set down a strict form of prayer, but she tells what she did, how she
recollected herself, centred herself in God’s presence; her carefully worded
definition of prayer in Ch 8. of The Life gives us an understanding of
how she herself prayed. “Mental prayer, in my opinion, is nothing else
than an intimate sharing between friends; it means taking time frequently to be
alone with Him who we know loves us”.
The
Way of Perfection sets the foundation
for prayer. Teresa states strongly that vocal prayer does not hinder mental
prayer. All prayer is addressed to God. We must come to both mental and vocal
prayer, the prayer of the liturgy, with the awareness to Whom we are speaking,
reverence in God’s presence. No just saying words, thoughtless recitation, all
should be addressed to Our Lord with reverence and respect. Those who read
Spanish tell us that Teresa always addressed God and Our Lord with the formal
Thou, while St. John of the Cross used the intimate You. ( It looses bit in the
English but we get the idea.) While Teresa had great friendship and intimacy
with Our Lord, she also had great respect. She reminds us to come to
prayer with self-awareness, facing and acknowledging our own sinfulness, our
brokenness and bringing to God our need for His loving mercy and forgiveness.
In an attitude of reverence we praise, adore, offer our words of love and
desire – share all with this Friend. Teresa allows us to share her own intimate
colloquies with Our Lord which flow through all her writings.
While
Teresa leads us into her way of prayer she is also adamant about building the
solid foundation for prayer, the practise of the virtues – all the ascetical
endeavour that must go into growing in “friendship with God”. She will
repeat continually when teaching her nuns, the need to develop, strengthen the
virtues ....detachment and humility (which always go together in Teresa’s
teaching,) self-knowledge, charity, obedience, forgiveness. We must make
progress in these virtues, her warning. “don’t stand still, don’t be dwarfs”!
Teresa
gives instruction and encouragement all through The Way of Perfection.
Her commentary on the Our Father, is an insight into how Teresa herself came to
this prayer and what she could draw from her meditation. She does not “push”
her reflections onto us, there is a great freedom and space in all her
teaching, but she gives guide lines, suggestions. Her desire is that all will
reach the prayer God is offering. As she said, “the complete gift of ourselves
to God, the surrender of our will to His and detachment from creatures”
This is the ideal and challenge she puts before her nuns, and indeed all of us.
Not all of us will receive the extraordinary graces, they are not the important
part, they are “extra”. If God gives them O.K. but the criterion for holiness
is doing God’s will, love of the neighbour, charity. Teresa often stressed that
holiness, depends on that, and holiness is what we are all called to, not
just religious, it is the call addressed to everyone.
Teresa
knew the sunlight of the wonderful mystical experiences she had of God’s love,
the locutions, ecstasies, raptures that poured into her soul at the period
before the Reform, these mystical graces that were preparing her for the
mission she would have in the Church. It was a time of grace, but also a time
of suffering, because grace always costs; she herself was amazed at the
development of the virtues in her soul during this period.
Fr.
Kavanagh writes in his introduction to The Way of Perfection, “Teresa
never received revelations for the Church.....(he noted that many saints
did) Her mystical life consisted in an inner experience of the content of
Revelation” She was tireless in checking that all her mystical
experiences were recounted to her confessors and were in conformity with Sacred
Scripture - this gave her peace and assurance. Anything not valid, “tear
it out, burn it” she begged those who censored her writings.
Move me here or there
Give
me Calvary or Tabor.
When
Teresa undertook the work of the Reform of Carmel she was aflame with desires
to do great things for God but as she wrote in The Way of Perfection, “I
realized that I was a woman.....and incapable of doing any of the useful things
that I desired to do in the service of the Lord....as a result I resolved to do
the little that was in my power”
The
Church in 1562 was in a process of reform. The Council of Trent was in its
final phase; the Reformation was in full swing and echoes of it reached Spain
in some form which greatly disturbed Teresa. The Reform was to give her the
opportunity to do something. Teresa and her friends were finally able to
set up the small Monastery of St. Joseph’s in 1562. It is a long and
interesting story but I would like to talk about what were Teresa’s hopes for
the Monastery.
In
setting up the Reform of Carmel Teresa’s ideal was to return to the original
Rule of Carmel—to the life lived by those unnamed hermits on Mt. Carmel in the
1200s. In all the upheavals Carmel has been through during the centuries,
the life had changed from the eremitical to the mendicant form of life...but in
the heart of every Carmelite there lives the desire for the solitude and space
of our early hermits, who left us a Rule and way of living that they treasured
and which they brought to Europe when they were really squeezed out of the Holy
Land—in the time of the Saracens.
Teresa’s
desire was to recapture the spirit of the hermit way of life, to value silence
and solitude and to live in continual prayer as the Rule enjoins us to do. Her
genius was that she could build the life of solitude into community living. So,
how did she envisage the way of life? The important emphasis was on prayer, the
liturgical prayer of the Church, and time and space for mental prayer, a more
contemplative approach to prayer. What was her purpose? We must all have a
purpose for what we do. To pray for the Church; by prayer and
sacrifice, by following the evangelical counsels, by a cloistered life of
solitude and silence, she sought to support the Church, the leaders, the
teachers, the whole mission and life of the Church. This was her purpose, what
inspired her. St. Therese of Lisieux understood all this profoundly.
Teresa
emphasised small in number. She wanted her nuns to be friends with each other,
“in this house ...all must be friends, all must be loved, all must be held
dear, all must be helped”. Teresa recognized that this was a big challenge; she
knew that it is not always the holiest one in the community who is the easiest
one to get on with, but, “no one is to be excluded, or feel excluded”. In Spain
all were not equal. Teresa was well aware of exclusion in communities and made
a strong point that this was not to be the case in her Monasteries. She wanted
her nuns to be united in their love of God, in their prayer for the Church.
Community
life is built and strengthened by time together, and Teresa introduced a period
of recreation into the daily horarium. This also was an innovation and Teresa
was adamant that all participate in this time together. She herself made this
an entertaining time, the nuns enjoyed her company, her stories, her experiences
with the foundations, and of course she expected that they too shared their
conversation with each other, and that they had peace and joy in community. I
think Teresa always communicates joy, joy in living, “God preserve us from
sorry saints”.
Give me Calvary or Tabor.
A
Tabor moment at this time was the visit of the Carmelite General to Spain in
1566. Teresa had been living at St. Joseph’s for two years; this was the first
visit of a Carmelite General for over a hundred years, (they just never got
around to getting over to Spain!) and Teresa was justifiably anxious. She a
Carmelite nun setting up a “reformed house” and actually living in it, with a
group of women she was directing, while she was still under obedience to
the superior of the Incarnation. She had established a Monastery, St. Joseph’s,
outside the jurisdiction of the Order, under the Bishop of Avila. The
Bishop of Avila explained all and asked the General to visit the Monastery.
Teresa said she spoke openly to General Rossi, telling him the whole story of
the foundation, her hopes and her prayer.....as Fr. Smet writes in his
Carmelite History, Rossi “was captivated by his vivacious daughter” and he
approved the Monastery and asked her to found more! He visited Teresa a
number of times to speak about prayer. Teresa always held General Rossi in high
esteem and even when the troubles in the Reform broke out and Rossi was given
false reports of Teresa, his disapproval was a great sorrow for her but her affection
and gratitude to him never wavered.
Sorrowing
or exulting
You
alone live in me.
St.
Thomas said that it is grace to receive mystical experiences and it is another
grace to be able to describe them. Teresa could recount her story and also do
something more – she inflames us with the desire to enter the world of
the soul, where God dwells, where he draws us. I remember when I was
novice and after hearing some pious talk saying to the Novice mistress, with a
good amount of fury, I don’t want to be holy, I can’t stand this, someone’s
idea of what holiness is”... I was expecting big trouble! Mother laughed,
“go out to the garden, dig your patch and see if you can remember what St.
Teresa says about gardening”.....I got the message, I was enthused! We all know
what it is like to dig, to carry the bucket of water, put the thirst plant
under a dripping tap, the good fortune to find a spare hose ....and then the
relief when the rain does come....a blessed relief all we Aussies from the
out-back country know. It is not hard to translate all that into life in the
spirit!
The
Interior Castle, the masterpiece of the interior journey by which God led
Teresa to union with the Divine Lover; the long hard road that led to the
transformation of the caterpillar into the beautiful butterfly. What I
love are the images that Teresa uses, they seem to capture and carry her
story – like poetry – we don’t have to understand everything but there is a
beauty and wonder in her images, she tells us that “we could never imagine the
beauty of our soul” Her amazing crystal castle, the castle that we all have,
with its millions of rooms, spaces of prayer, suffering, challenges, where the
soft whistle of the Shepherd reaches through the spaces, the distractions, it
reaches to the soul, drawing it towards Our Lord and the mystery of the Holy
Trinity. There are the serpents, the darker areas that must be recognized and
taken along on the journey to transformation.
Teresa
reached her centre – and she didn’t go off into a life of ecstasy and
contemplation, but rather, the enormous, arduous work of the foundations; 17
convents, going from one end of Spain to the other in a mule cart! All
kinds of problems, accidents on the road, frightened, terrified nuns! law
suites, litigation, letter writing, troubles that seemed as though all her work
would be undone; and through it all, her poor health. Reading her I certainly
tend to forget that it is an elderly lady with very frail health telling this
incredible story, doing this amazing work for God. I think St. Teresa
would say to us, after the time of prayer, “ my daughters , Good Works,
God wants Good Works”!
She
could surely say at the end of her life to Our Lord -- to His Majesty –
“Yours I am, for You I was born.. You alone live in me. I’ve tried to do what
You wanted of me”!
Thank
you dear St. Teresa for all that you did with such love for God, for the Church
and which continues to live and reach us today in Carmel. A very Happy 500th
Birthday. May I ask you for a special blessing as I share your date .....but my
years look very insignificant beside your 500!